Circumstantial Tunes
These are triggered by events. Loads of these. For exampleA Four-Legged Friend - this goes off everytime I see a dog. Since I have two this happens a lot. I don't know the words properly so this always ends "A 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 legged friend". .Must look that up.
Pennies from Heaven - it's raining.
Sunny Side of the Street - one side of the street is sunny
All of Me - Why not take all of me? This means the younguns are asking me for lots of things.
Pick Yourself Up Take a deep breath, / Dust yourself off. / And start all over again.
or
Tubthumping I get knocked down / But I get up again / Never going to keep me down.
A disaster has occurred. Tubthumping also inextricably linked with the day Diana died, so any mention of Princess D will provoke it. Though of course she didn't get up again.
Like a G6 - an HP Pavilion G6 laptop has come into the workshop.
Muzak (mainly instrumental)
These support me through various scenarios. E.G.The Girl from Ipanema - how it torments me. Often performed out loud with a doo-doo-doo treatment. Good for when you are waiting for computers to get on with something. With practice I can now insert the spoken word "Loading" intermittently.
The Benny Hill Music - when people are crashing into each other in a farcical way
Anything by Sigur Ros
or
Chariots of FireFor when something good has happened and I feel I want to do a slow-motion celebration.
Adverts
Occur randomly and insistently.Kellog's Country Store (performed by a surprisingly moving folky lady). Bring me honey / Bring me apples / Bring me hazelnuts / Bring me wheat/ Bring me good things to ee-ee-eat / In Kellog's country store.
Fairy Liquid Now hands that do dishes can be soft as your face / With mild green / Fairy Liquid
BUM BUM BUM BUM - Esso Blue
Reading Bedding - Not even a song, but everyone round here must be prone to it. For beds in Reading / You better be Heading / To Reading Bedding. Genius.
Misc
I've no idea what this is doing in my head and why it visits me on a daily basis.When Father papered the parlour, you couldn't see pa for paste
Dabbing it here, dabbing it there, paste and paper everywhere
Mother was stuck to the ceiling; the kids were stuck to the floor
I never knew a blooming family so stuck up before.